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Saturday, January 13th, 2007
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And you know I will take your hand
Lead you away from the other girls
I will whisper in Your Ear
You are so fucking beautiful
And you will say likewise
And play with my fingers more
My heart is racing and my cheeks are red
And you know I will travel as far as you want me
Even though you don't really want me
Though it will never be enough
It will always cause me pain
TO get so close and have it feel nothing
Alway feel like nothing
Cause you don't fill me up
Cause you’re just a ghost in my mind
You were never real for me
You kept your distance across the room
And it hurts me to say
I wish I'd never known you that way.
And now this boy is here and yr not
He looks like you, but hes definitely not,
I'm getting drunk on the Sunrise again,
Hoping it will fill the hole inside me,
I should be getting drunk on the moon
It might fill me up with a pure white light
Instead of this burning chest I know too well
And hes staring at me the way you did,
He would love me a thousand times better
He could fill me up with something pure,
I just turn away and leave him on the couch
Cause I can’t say yes to something good just yet
I'm still picking at that hole, making it grow
So I can have that fun, that awful fun
Trying to fill it with smoke and the sunshine.
Don’t read too much into it
Cause you ask I’ll just "I’m just fine"
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Tuesday, January 9th, 2007
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i want to work, love and share
trying to do whats right
working up the effort
to leave the house before its dark
i got things to do
the pets need to be fed
the rubbish needs to be taken out
dishes need to be washed
people keep calling me
but i don't answer the phone
cause i can't pretend i'm fine today
i can't handle any of this
so i'll just lay here
with my ashtray overflowing
just like in some song i love
but its not part of the life i want
i want to be the girl for you
cause i know you like me
but i'd have to exist
more than i do right now
just livings hard enough
without having to be
something else for you
cause if you saw me
right here right now
you couldn't handle it
i don't have that kind of faith in you
and i haven't even thought of offering
to let you in the door
so i'll just lay here
with my ashtray overflowing
just like in some song i love
but its not part of the live i want
if you try and save me
i'd have to kill you
with that look in your eyes
that burns me worse than
you could ever know
it hurts too much to think of you
so i won't open that door
cause how you think you see me
is too important and easy to destroy
i need it to know how i could be
when i get out of this bed
but not yet, honey, not just yet
so i'll just lay here
with my ashtray overflowing
just like in some song i love
but its not part of the life i want
its a chain that never ends
i don't even know if i want it too break
cause its all i've ever known
its a path to follow
a thin white line to walk
and if i want to want to escape
i've got too many pills i can take
but not yet cause i think
one day, one day, one day
i'll make it out into the sunlight
but until then, this room is where i'll be
so i'll just lay here
with my ashtray overflowing
just like in some song i love
but its not part of the life i want
one day i'm gona wash my face
drink some coffee and brush my messy hair
put on my best shoes
and my best smile
i'll go meet some friends
and i'll finally burn you that cd
about all the sad things we feel
and how we can't help eachother
cause we're both in the dark
and i'll fuck you, and i'll hate you
and i won't cry, but you might
and then, and then, and then,
and then i'll go back to that room
and put on some sad song
about how i'll lay here
with my ashtray overflowing
how its just like that song, that song i'm playing
and how i love that song
but how i hate that its part of the life i live
and theres a pain in my chest
and suddenly i'm scared of dying
here all alone, as my pets are hungry
and i am so soft and tender
but then it goes
and i realise i'm a hypocrite
just like the rest
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Monday, August 29th, 2005
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you smoke with me
you drink with me
but you won't sing and dance
with me
you said we were superstars
and i loved you for that
and you gave me vodka
you gave me cigarettes
but you won't sing and dance
with me
i have to do that alone
you said i was amazing
you said you i was beautiful
but you won't sing and dance
with me
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